Strength in Others

I believe that you can find much needed strength in others.  I have been blessed with a select few people in my life that I would consider my "rocks".  When I am having one of my "freaking out" moments, I can call these people and they bring me back down to Earth.

 I have struggled with the question, "How much do I share?" When I first began having these unwanted, scary thoughts, I kept it all inside. They were so foreign and scary to me that I was ashamed I was having them.  I tried distracting myself whenever possible, and telling myself they would eventually go away.

 Finally, after about a year, I couldn't take it anymore and broke down, telling my mom everything I was struggling so desperately with.  That was the first step I made toward my healing.  When I opened up to my mom I realized I wasn't crazy and I just needed some help.  It was so freeing and felt like a big mask had been taken off, to finally let it all out.

 I have been blessed with an amazingly understanding mother, who has always believed in me and I've never doubted that she's my biggest fan.  Through going to therapy and being more open with a few people, I have learned that I am not alone!!  I'm not the only one who has had some crazy ass thoughts!!  That was great news because for a long time I was convinced that there was no one else in the world that struggled the way I did.  If I would have never reached out to others who knows where I would be now.  I hope now, that I can help others know that they are not alone and there is strength to be found in others.

---JADE---